The Phantom Tollbooth

The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster, 1961.

Milo is a boy who never really knows what he wants or what to do with himself.  He is always bored because he doesn’t really know the purpose or point of doing anything.  Nothing he learns in school interests him because he can’t see what he could ever do with the knowledge.  He never bothers to read the books he has, play with his toys, or learn to use his tools because he just doesn’t have the imagination to appreciate them or what he could do with them.

One day, when Milo gets home from school, he finds an unexpected package.  It’s not his birthday or Christmas, but the package is definitely intended for him because it has his name on it: “For Milo, who has plenty of time.”  There is a list of items contained in the package: 1 tollbooth (which must be assembled, according to the directions), 3 precautionary signs (“to be used in a precautionary fashion”), some coins for the tollbooth, a map (with no familiar places on it), and a driver’s rule book (which must be obeyed).  Interestingly, it promises that if Milo is not satisfied with his tollbooth experience, his time will be refunded.  Since Milo doesn’t think he has anything else to do anyway, he decides that he might as well unwrap the tollbooth and set it up. 

Although Milo thinks that the map is purely fictional and that the tollbooth is just a playset, he decides that he might as well select a destination on it for his trip through the tollbooth.  He closes his eyes, puts a finger on the map, and selects a place called “Dictionopolis.” He gets in the toy car, puts a coin in the tollbooth, and goes through it.

To his surprise, Milo suddenly finds himself driving down a real highway, no longer in his own apartment.  He sees a sign pointing the way to a place called Expectations, and he stops to ask a man about it.  At first, he thinks he’s talking to a weather man, but the man corrects him, saying that he’s really the “Whether man.”  Part of his job is to hurry people along, even if they have no expectations.  Nothing the Whether Man says to Milo makes sense to him, so he decides that he’d better just get going.

As Milo drives down the highway, he gets bored and starts daydreaming.  As his mind wanders, the scenery gets duller and grayer, the car slows down, and eventually, the car stops and won’t move further.  Milo looks around and wonders where he is.  It turns out that he’s in the Doldrums, the home of the Lethargarians.  They tell him that thinking isn’t allowed there.  Milo says that’s a dumb rule because everybody thinks.  The Lethargarians say that they never think and Milo must not have thought either because, if he had, he wouldn’t be there.  People usually get to the Doldrums because they’re not thinking, and once they’re there, nobody is allowed to think.  They refer Milo to the rule book that came with the tollbooth.  Milo looks in the rule book and sees that is a rule.  There are also limits on laughing and smiling in the Doldrums.  Milo asks the Lethargarians what they do if they can’t think or laugh.  They say that they can do anything as long as they’re also doing nothing.  Mainly, they do things like daydreaming, napping, loafing, loitering, and wasting time.  They say it gives them a full schedule and allows them to get nothing done, which they consider an important accomplishment.  Milo asks them if that’s what everybody here does, and they say that the one person who doesn’t is the Watch Dog, who tries to make sure that nobody wastes time.

At that point, the Watch Dog shows up.  The Watch Dog looks like a dog, but his body is an alarm clock.  The Watch Dog asks Milo what he’s doing, and is alarmed when Milo says that he’s “killing time.”  It’s bad enough when people waste time, but killing it is horrible!  (The book is full of these kinds of puns. It’s just getting started.)  Milo explains how he got stuck in the Doldrums while he was on his way to Dictionopolis and asks the Watch Dog for help.  The Watch Dog explains that if he got there by not thinking, he can also get out by thinking and asks to come along because he likes car rides.  Milo agrees, and the two of them get in the car.  Milo thinks as hard as he can (which the book notes isn’t easy for Milo because he’s not used to thinking and doesn’t do it too often).  Gradually, as Milo thinks of various things, the car begins to move.  The faster Milo thinks, the faster the car goes.  Milo learns that it’s possible to accomplish a lot with just a little thought.

The Watch Dog’s name is Tock because his older brother is named Tick. However, their names are a mistake because his older brother only makes a tock sound, and Tock only makes a tick sound.  It’s a source of pain and disappointment.  Tock tells Milo about the origin of time and why Watch Dogs find it important to make sure that people use time well.  He says that time is the most valuable possession because it always keeps moving.

When they arrive at Dictionopolis, the gatekeeper won’t let them in immediately because Milo doesn’t have a reason for being there.  Nobody gets let in without a reason.  Fortunately, the gatekeeper always keeps a few spare reasons lying around, and he decides to let Milo have one.  The one he selects is “WHY NOT?”, which the gatekeeper considers a good, all-purpose reason for doing anything.  (I don’t know. I’ve heard that one followed up by an angry “I’ll tell you why not!” before.)

As readers have probably guessed, Dictionopolis is all about words. When Milo enters the city, he finds himself in the marketplace, which is called the “Word Market.”  The ruler of Dictionopolis is Azaz the Unabridged, and when Milo is welcomed to the city by the members of the king’s cabinet, they do so in multiple ways, using synonyms.  Milo asks them why they don’t just pick one word and stick with it, but they’re not interested in that.  They say that it’s not their business to make sense and that one word is as good as another, so why not use them all?  (That isn’t true, but the story tells you why not later.)  They go on to tell Milo that letters grow on trees here, and people come from all over to buy all the words they need in the Word Market in town.  Part of the cabinet’s duty is to make sure that all of the words being sold are real words and have real meanings because people would have no use for nonsense words that don’t mean anything and that nobody will understand.  The cabinet doesn’t seem to care about whether or not the words are being used in a way that makes sense as long as they’re real words. (If you’re familiar with business speak or buzzwords, you’ve probably noticed that much of it works on a similar principle.)  Putting the words into a context that makes sense isn’t their job.  (Later, you meet the person who had that job.)  However, the cabinet does advise Milo to be careful when choosing his words and to say only what he means to say.  They excuse themselves to get ready for the banquet and say that they’ll see Milo there later, although Milo doesn’t know what banquet they’re talking about.

Milo and Tock explore the Word Market.  Milo is fascinated by the variety of words available.  He doesn’t know what they all mean, but he thinks that if he can buy some, he can learn how to use them.  He chooses three words he doesn’t know: quagmire, flabbergast, and upholstery. (I’m surprised he didn’t know the last one because, surely, he has upholstered furniture in his apartment.)  Unfortunately, Milo quickly realizes that he has only one coin with him, and he’ll need that coin to get back through the tollbooth.  Eventually, he finds a stall selling individual letters for people who like to make their own words.  The stall owner gives them some free samples to taste. They taste good to Milo, and the stall owner tells them that sets of letters come with instructions.  Milo doesn’t think he’s very good at making words, but the Spelling Bee, a giant bee, begins showing him how to spell words.  However, the Humbug, a grumpy bug, tries to tell Milo not to bother learning.  The Spelling Bee tells Milo not to listen to the Humbug because he just tells tall stories and doesn’t actually know anything, not even how to spell his own name.

The Spelling Bee and the Humbug start fighting and knock over all the word stalls around them. There is a big mess, all the words get scrambled, and it takes some time before everyone sorts everything out.  By that time, the Spelling Bee is gone, and when the policeman comes, the Humbug blames everything on Milo and Tock.  At first, it seems like Milo will get off lightly because the policeman (who is also the judge) gives him the shortest “sentence” he can think of (“I am”).  Unfortunately, he’s also the jailer and takes Milo and Tock to prison for 6 million years.

In the prison, Milo and Tock meet the Which.  At first, Milo thinks that she’s a “witch”, but she says many people make that mistake.  The Which is King Azaz’s great-aunt, and her job used to be to make sure that people correctly chose which words to use and didn’t use more words than necessary. (A problem that Milo noticed in the market.)  The Which explains that she was thrown into prison because she got too carried away with her job and became too miserly with words. Word economy is good (and something I struggle with), but rather than promoting brevity, the Which started promoting silence instead,. It got so bad that people eventually stopped buying words and the market was failing, so the king had to put a stop to it.  The Which says that she understands now where she went wrong, and Milo asks her if there’s anything that he can do to help her.  The Which says that the only thing that would help her would be the return of Rhyme and Reason.  When Milo asks who they are, she tells him the story of the founding of the Kingdom of Wisdom.

Years ago, the King of Wisdom had two sons, and he was proud of both, but one of them had an obsession with words, and the other had an obsession with numbers.  The king didn’t realize how bad their conflict was growing, and it got worse over time. One day, the king found a pair of abandoned infant twins.  The twins were both girls, and the king had always wanted daughters as well as sons, so he adopted them and named them Rhyme and Reason.  Everyone loved Rhyme and Reason, and they had a talent for resolving problems and disputes. When the king died, he left his kingdom to both of his sons and left instructions for them both to look after Rhyme and Reason. The word-obsessed son, Azaz, established a capital city of his own, Dictionopolis, and the number-obsessed son, the Mathemagician, established the city of Digitopolis.  Rhyme and Reason remained in the city of Wisdom and acted as advisers to the brothers, mediating their disputes.  This system worked until the brothers got into their worst fight over whether words or numbers are most important.  They took this dispute to Rhyme and Reason, who said that both are of equal importance. This satisfied most people, but both brothers were angry because they had wanted the girls to make a definite choice between them. In their last joint act, they banished Rhyme and Reason to the Castle in the Air. Since then, there has been continued fighting between the two brothers and their respective cities, the city of Wisdom has been neglected, and there’s been no Rhyme or Reason to any of it. (Ha, ha.)

Milo says that maybe they could rescue Rhyme and Reason from the Castle in the Air. The Which says that would be difficult because there’s only one stairway to the castle, and it’s guarded by demons. Milo remembers that there is also the matter of them being stuck in prison for 6 million years. The Which says that being in prison isn’t really a problem. Although the policeman/judge/jailer likes putting people in prison, he doesn’t care much about keeping them there, so Milo and Tock can leave when they like, and he probably won’t notice. (Sounds like he’s not very good at the “jailer” part of his job.)  The Which points out a button on the wall, Milo presses it, and a door opens.

When they step outside, the king’s cabinet members come to take him to the banquet that they mentioned earlier. They have Milo and Tock step into their wagon and tell them to be quiet because “it goes without saying.” (Ha, ha.) They take Milo and Tock to a palace shaped like a book, where they meet King Azaz and join the banquet.

The banquet is a pun-filled meal where everyone has to literally eat their words and have half-baked ideas for dessert.  (Half-baked ideas look good, but you shouldn’t have too many because you can get sick of them. Tock says so.)  Nothing makes sense, and even the king realizes it, which gives Milo the opportunity to suggest bringing back Rhyme and Reason.  The king isn’t sure that’s possible, and the Humbug, of course, volunteers Milo and Tock for the job.  The joke turns out to be on him because the king volunteers the Humbug to assist Milo.  Reaching Rhyme and Reason will be a perilous journey, and possibly the most difficult part will be getting the Mathemagician to agree to let them do it.

The book is available to borrow and read for free online through Internet Archive (multiple copies). There is also a movie version of this book (mostly animated but part live action) with songs. You can see a trailer for it on YouTube.

My Reaction

The Phantom Tollbooth is a fantasy story, but like many fantasy stories, it’s also a morality story.  It’s a little like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, which aims to correct children’s bad habits.  Milo’s boredom problems are due to his lack of thought for the things he could do and imagination to figure out how to make use of what he has.  His adventures after he goes through the Phantom Tollbooth help him to see things differently and to learn to use his mind creatively.

However, I wouldn’t say that the story is too preachy.  A couple of parts started to feel a little like a lecture, but it’s set in a fantasy land that feels a little like Alice in Wonderland.  There’s a healthy dose of nonsense that keeps things interesting and fun.  The book is peppered with puns and peopled by a fascinating variety of characters.  There’s the boy who can see through everyone and everything, who teaches Milo to look at things from an adult perspective and helps him to realize the benefit of keeping his feet on the ground (both of those are also puns). There’s the man who is the world’s shortest giant, the world’s tallest midget, the world’s thinnest fat man, and the world’s fattest thin man all at the same time.  Basically, he’s just an ordinary guy who’s noticed that people think of him in different ways when they compare him with themselves.

I was first introduced to this story when I was in elementary school, as many people were.  Our teacher read it to us and showed us the cartoon version.  Parts of songs from that version still get stuck in my head, almost 30 years later.  (“Don’t Say There’s Nothing To Do the Doldrums …”) The part of the story that stuck with me the longest was the Dodecahedron, a shape with twelve sides. If you’ve seen the twelve-sided dice used for Dungeons and Dragons and similar role-playing games, those are dodecahedrons. In the book, the Dodecahedron is talking character as well as a shape, but I remember it because our teacher gave us paper cut-outs to make our own dodecahedrons. I made two of them, and I might still have one somewhere.

The Case of the Roving Rolls

Brains Benton

The Case of the Roving Rolls by George Wyatt (Charles Spain Verral), 1961.

Summer has been dull, with no mysteries to solve. Jimmy doesn’t mind too much because he has other things to do, but his friend and partner in their detective agency, “Brains” Benton, is going a little stir-crazy. When they started their detective agency, they named it the Benton and Carson International Detective Agency, but so far, they’ve only solved local cases. Brains wants to find an international case to solve to justify the name. The opportunity comes when Jimmy gets a letter from his Uncle Ed, who has been living overseas.

Uncle Ed is a pilot who has been living in a fictional Middle-Eastern country called Kassabeba. In his letter, he mentions that something strange has been happening there recently, although he finds it hard to explain exactly what’s been happening. He says that, soon, the answer may be coming to the boys’ town of Crestwood, if it’s not there already. The Emir who ruled the country died under somewhat suspicious circumstances, and his half brother took over from him, but the Emir also had a son who was attending Eton at the time his father died. Apparently, the Emir’s half brother has been doing everything he can to prevent this young prince from coming home to challenge his rule of their country. Uncle Ed and some others who were friendly with the former Emir and like his son, Prince Halam, have been trying to help him, although it’s not going very well. The half brother hasn’t been coronated as the new Emir yet, but the prince’s supporters doubt they can get the prince back home before that happens in another month. Instead, they’ve decided to send the prince to Crestwood College, where Brains’s parents are teachers, seeing it as a quieter, safer place for him to finish his education. The prince’s supporters are hoping that he’ll have another chance at ruling his country when his education is complete. Unfortunately, Uncle Ed has just received word that the half brother has sent a couple of his associates to the US. It’s possible that he’s discovered where the prince is going, and his associates may be heading to Crestwood to harm the prince. Uncle Ed describes these two associates – Jujab, who is short and round with a moon-shaped face, and “the Duke”, who is tall and lanky with a horse face and claims to be British.

The prospect of helping to protect a prince from another country is exciting, and Brains has a thought about the first thing they should do. He says that, if people are coming to Crestwood from another country, probably one of the first things they would do is try to connect with someone else from their own country who is already living in Crestwood because they could use some help and support. Crestwood isn’t a big city, and there is only one other person from Kassabeba already living there, a man named Khouri who works as a cook for a wealthy woman in town. Jimmy is afraid of the cook because he’s a temperamental man, and he had a bad run-in with him at Mrs. Willoughby’s mansion. Jimmy’s been doing a little work there because Mrs. Willoughby hired him to make some shelves for a gardening show, and the cook flew into a rage at him for coming into the kitchen. However, Brains thinks it’s important that they find out if Jujab and the Duke have been to see the cook.

When Jimmy is on his way to the Willoughby estate to meet Brains there after his paper route, he is almost hit by Mrs. Willoughby’s Rolls-Royce … but there’s nobody driving it! Yet, somebody must be controlling it somehow because the car deliberately swerved toward Jimmy and then made a turn in the road. Just after the Rolls-Royce almost hits Jimmy, Mrs. Willoughby’s British butler and chauffeur, Frothingham, comes along on a bicycle, in pursuit of the car. He falls off the bike, and Jimmy helps him. Frothingham explains that he’s got to catch up to the car. He says that it was parked in the Willoughby driveway and that the hand brake was set, and he can’t understand what happened. When Jimmy says that maybe the brake just failed, Frothingham says that he doesn’t think it’s likely because it’s a good quality car and well-maintained. When Brains comes along, Jimmy explains the situation to him, and the two of them follow Frothingham to where he has found the Rolls-Royce parked and apparently undamaged.

Frothingham says that he still can’t imagine who was driving the car and just abandoned it, and Jimmy is still sure that he didn’t see anyone behind the wheel. Brains says that he has an idea about it but that this strange occurrence is a sign that something more serious is about to happen. When Frothingham asks him what he means by that, Brains asks him if he’s seen any unusual strangers around the Willoughby estate recently. Frothingham says that he hasn’t, but Brains is still convinced that the people who are after the prince have been around the Willoughby estate already and that there may be something important hidden in the car.

When the boys later see the Rolls-Royce strike a pedestrian, Frothingham is blamed. The boys are sure that he’s innocent, but they didn’t see who was driving the car, so they can’t swear to it. The boys struggle to clear Frothingham’s name.

My Reaction and Spoilers

I liked this story in the series better than the last one that I read because I felt like there was more intrigue and uncertainty. We do have two specific villains that Brains and Jimmy are looking for from the beginning – the men known as Jujab and the Duke. The characters have descriptions of them, and they know that these men pose a threat to the young prince who will be arriving soon. That means that these people haven’t actually done anything yet, but Brains and Jimmy want to find them before they do.

The incidents with the car are odd and seem like they might be unrelated at first, but they are actually part of the villains’ plot. When Frothingham was first introduced, I was suspicious of him because he seems to be British, but the man known as the Duke is known for posing as a British person. Although the characters in the story seem to have known and liked Frothingham for some time, it occurred to me that he could have been planted in Crestwood for longer than Jimmy’s uncle thought. However, that’s not the case. (Spoiler!) Frothingham is just exactly what he seems to be, an innocent man working for a wealthy local woman. In order for Jujab and the Duke to accomplish their mission, they have to establish some kind of identity for themselves in Crestwood. By making it seem like Frothingham committed a hit-and-run, they get his drivers’ license temporarily revoked so that the man known as the Duke can get hired as a temporary chauffeur for Mrs. Willoughby. Mrs. Willoughby is the one who’s going to meet the young prince when he arrives, so her chauffeur is in a perfect position for some foul play.

The boys have all the information they need to figure this out about halfway through the book, but what makes this book intriguing is that there’s more going on than just the evil half-uncle’s associates trying to get to the prince. When the prince actually arrives, the boys ask him what happens at a coronation ceremony in his country. (This is part of why the prince comes from a fictional country. Not only does the author not have to account for real people and events in a real country, but he can also make up any customs he wants for this country.) The prince describes the ceremony, including a part where the new Emir drinks spring water called the “Water of Life” from a special Golden Vial that has been used for the purpose for generations. The ceremony cannot take place without this Golden Vial, and Brains realizes that, although the prince believes that the vial is back in his home country with his half-uncle, it has actually been transported to the US. It turns out that Mrs. Willoughby’s car was originally owned by the prince’s father and that he left it to her because she was a friend of his and had admired it … and maybe because he hoped that his son would also go to her and retrieve the Golden Vial from the car. The half-uncle’s associates are not just in the US to find the prince but to retrieve this Golden Vial because, without it, the half-uncle cannot be coronated at all.

One other point I thought I would mention is that, when Jimmy first saw the car and didn’t see a driver, I thought that, for some reason, the villains installed a remote control device in the car. This book was written a few years before remote controlled cars were first sold, but with Brains interested in new inventions, it wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibility. However, that’s not the case with this story. The car does have a driver; it’s just that he’s crouched down so he can’t be seen as well. Science and invention enter the story when they realize that they can find the Golden Vial with a Geiger counter because it contains a special stone that contains radioactive material.

Mrs. Armitage, Queen of the Road

ArmitageRoad

Mrs. Armitage, Queen of the Road by Quentin Blake, 2003.

When Mrs. Armitage‘s Uncle Cosmo decides to get a new motorcycle, he lets her have his old car.  However, it isn’t in very good condition.

ArmitageRoadCar

Mrs. Armitage and Breakspear decide to try it out, but as they drive along, pieces of the car fall off.  Some of it is because the car is in bad repair, and some is due to accidents Mrs. Armitage has.  First, the hubcabs, then the fenders fall off.  Mrs. Armitage shrugs it off , saying, “Who needs them?”

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Eventually, the car goes almost entirely to pieces, but who needs it all?

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When Uncle Cosmo shows up with his friends and their motorcycles, they help her fix up what’s left of the car into one amazing machine!

The book is available to borrow and read for free online through Internet Archive (multiple copies, including one in Spanish).

ArmitageRoadMachine

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

ChittyChitty Chitty Bang Bang by Ian Fleming, 1964.

Not everyone is aware that the creator of James Bond wrote a children’s book, although the movie Chitty Chitty Bang Bang is a children’s classic.  However, the movie differs greatly from the original book, which doesn’t have anything to do with a toy-obsessed baron who has forbidden children in his kingdom, and there is no Truly Scrumptious (sorry).

Commander Caractacus Pott, retired, is an explorer and inventor who lives in a little house in the countryside with his wife Mimsie and their children, a set of eight-year-old twins named Jeremy and Jemima.  Some of the locals call Commander Pott, “Crackpott” because of his strange inventions, which never earn him very much money until one of this inventions pays off when he sells the candy whistles he creates to Lord Skrumshus’s candy company.

With the money he earns, Pott decides to buy something that his family has wanted for a while: their own car.  But, they don’t want just any boring car like everyone else.  They want something special.  They find it when they spot a former racing car that’s due for the scrap heap.  No one wants it because it would take a lot of time and money to fix.  The Pott family falls in love with it immediately, and Jemima thinks it might even be magical because the license plate says “GEN 11”, which looks like “genii” (or “genie”).  The garage man is relieved to find a buyer who appreciates the car’s history and potential and says that she’s sure to reward them for saving her from being scrap.

After Pott spends a great deal of time fixing up the car (which they name “Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang” because of the sounds it makes) and adding some additional inventions of his own, he begins to suspect that both Jemima and the garage man are right: the car is magical and does want to repay them for saving her life.  He starts to notice changes that the car makes to herself overnight, adding extra buttons and features that he knows he didn’t put there.  He’s not sure what they’re for until the family gets stuck in traffic the first time they decide to take the car out for a picnic. Messages on the car’s dashboard light up, telling Pott to pull some of the car’s mysterious levers.  When he does, the car sprouts wings and flies over the other cars in front of them, over towns and beaches, and even over the English Channel!

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Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang takes the Pott family to a sandbar so they can have a private beach all to themselves.  But, that’s only the beginning of their adventure!  Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang can also turn into a hovercraft, and the family decides to take it on a special holiday to France.  When they reach the coast of France, they find a cave and start to explore it.  Someone has set up various devices inside to scare people away, but that only makes the Pott family more curious and determined to find out why.

It turns out that the cave is a hideout for a band of smugglers, and when the Pott family destroys it, they want revenge!

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At the end of the book, there is a recipe for “Monsieur Bon-Bon’s Secret ‘Fooj'” (they mean ‘fudge’, Monsieur Bon-Bon is a character in the story).

Having known the movie version since I was a kid, I really prefer the movie to the book.  With a magical car at their disposal, the more fairy-tale story about the castle and tyrannical, toy-obsessed baron seems more fitting than the story about smugglers.  But, that being said, the book is still a lot of fun.

The book is available to borrow and read for free online through Internet Archive.